There are 3.8 billion women on Earth. There were 3.9 billion men. But now, it’s just you…and your phone won’t stop ringing. Is this a fantasy? A paradise? …Or a prison?
You wake up one morning, and half the world’s population is missing. But they didn’t disappear indiscriminately… It’s just the boys that are gone; the crew, the fellas, the guys, the bros.
We’re not sure where they went, or what happened to them, but we can say that you’ve got bigger problems than worrying about who you’re going to get beer and watch football with…
The grief comes first. Then it’s the girls. And then comes the big question: Repopulation! Are you up for it?
Being solely responsible for repopulating the world, one female at a time, might sound like fun. But in reality, it’s a lot of hard work.
Since 1973, male sperm counts across America and Europe have been going down. No one really knows why, but many scientists believe that pollution, stress, smoking, and drinking are probable causes.
To restore the human race, you, the last man on Earth, would be expected to do whatever it takes to boost his fertility. To raise your testosterone levels, you’d want to exercise regularly and take lots of vitamin D.
You’d also have to increase your vitamin C and zinc intake, since they’re both crucial antioxidants you need for healthier sperm. As for alcohol, while it might be a great social lubricant, it won’t help you get anyone pregnant, due to the negative effects it has on fertility.
But if the idea of no more beer keeps you up at night, that won’t do you any favors either, since getting enough sleep and reducing stress are just as important! But less stress is a big thing to ask for when half the world and their dad is suddenly missing, and it’s up to you to repopulate the Earth!
Given the gravity of the situation, you probably wouldn’t get to enjoy your time with 3.8 billion eligible bachelorettes. More realistically, you’d probably be set up in some kind of fertility clinic for efficiency’s sake.
And while you could probably count on a closed door, everyone’s still gonna know what you’re doing in there… But they don’t have to know your method! Assuming the internet is still up and running, you might want to consider getting a VPN.
Now you might be thinking, “”Why do I need a VPN if I’m the last man on Earth?”” You won’t be asking that question when you’re suddenly getting messages from millions of ladies, who now know everything about you from your favorite foods to where you shop for underwear!
Of course, you don’t actually have to worry about that happening because we’ll never get to a point where there’s only one man left on Earth! That being said, evidence suggests that roughly 6,000 years ago, due to climate or ecological factors that seemed to have had a greater impact on the male population, there was only one man for every 17 women. In more modern examples, wars have been the biggest factor causing a gender imbalance between men and women in a given society.
In the absolute worst-case scenario, scientists estimate that we’d need a mix of 98 healthy men and women to establish a stable, non-inbred population. But of course, the easiest way to solve this problem is to avoid it altogether!
Let’s prevent any large-scale ecological disasters by taking better care of our environment. Let’s choose love over war. And let’s keep asking big questions that will make our society better!
- “World Population 2019 | Population Clock Live”. 2019. countrymeters.info. Accessed September 26 2019.
- “Sperm Counts Continue To Fall”. Fetters, Ashley. 2018. The Atlantic. Accessed September 26 2019.
- “10 Ways To Boost Male Fertility And Increase Sperm Count”. 2019. Healthline. Accessed September 26 2019.
- “Why Do Genes Suggest Most Men Died Off 7,000 Years Ago?”. Saplakoglu, Yasemin. 2018. livescience.com. Accessed September 26 2019.
- “Zinc Is An Essential Element For Male Fertility: A Review Of Zn Roles In Men’S Health, Germination, Sperm Quality, And Fertilization”. Ali Fallah, Abasalt Hosseinzadeh Colagar. 2018. Journal Of Reproduction & Infertility 19 (2): 69.
- “Does Alcohol Kill Sperm? Learn How It Affects Sperm And Your Fertility”. 2019. Healthline. Accessed September 26 2019.